Part II of II of 33 & 1/3

So, T-red.

Duel. It was a duel. A which boy is better contest between me and Moron who thought I would allow myself to be out-boy'd by any boy, no less in front of a ROOM FULL of hot girls.

Chris Alan of The Southern Theater's Monday Night Open-Mic Comedy w/Moron was Moron.

I! Your hero, Congressman Wolf Alexander, Alex to his favorite red-headed bunny, went outside. After the best part of this part of this part...

He said he was going to call the police. As I was sitting in the booth telling him "nuts" like General Anthony McAuliffe. But him being a wuss I believed him when he said he would call the police. Ended up the opposite.

So I stood up, after staring him down before he hustled for the phone, and called him a pussy very loudly. 

"Pussy!" Right at his back like an arrow from Katniss.

The word pussy was a poor choice of words. Pussy is a good thing. Chris is not a good thing. A "chicken" or a "hoopleheaded cocksucker" would have worked better.

Went outside. Whereupon there was musket fire (argument from behind fixed positions (the railings out front (I stood on the public walkway))) between Chris in front of the window and his stupid jackfuck below me (name unknown) and myself.

And I do not shoot poorly. 

So Chris got angry and charged up at me. And as I pretended to fear to cower, yelled out "please hit me first. Please hit me first. Please hit me first."

Because fear of a whoopin' is barely a thing for me. Fear of arrest for hurting someone while defending myself much higher. So I wanted every audience member of the dozen out there to know he hit me first when I hit him second.

And third.

He growled. That's all.

And tenth.

So I held the hill! I HELD THE POSITION. As I shall always hold the position. AND AM AS I TYPE. Another story.

I had said, moments before refusing to flinch at Chris rubbing himself on me, "I DON'T LISTEN TO BOYS! SEND A GIRL OUT HERE AND HER I'LL LISTEN TO,"

A girl appeared.

A very sexy sassy southern one. The bartendress. She said "git!" except she said "go," or something like it and I said, grinning, "yes, ma'am."

;0)

THE END

There is another part but it's classified.

As I was leaving the toady or the stupid jackfuck who said he was a cop or something and wasn't yelled out a provocation as if I had a choice about leaving, so I blew "him" a kiss. 

But it was for her.