Femsoc Girls! Stalk Your Stalkers

---------- Forwarded message ---------

From: Wolf Alexander <congressmanalexander@gmail.com>

Date: Mon, May 5, 2025, 1:02 AM

Subject: Femsoc Girls: Blocking is For Victims

To: <thefeministsocietyatnyu@gmail.com>

Cc: <egenova@nyunews.com>, <abairdhassell@nyunews.com>, <iderasmo@nyunews.com>, <kwelander@nyunews.com>, <tnejand@nyunews.com>, <mkotval@nyunews.com>, <nzaldivar@nyunews.com>, <lng@nyunews.com>, <jdiorio@nyunews.com>, <amehta@nyunews.com>, <ldonnelly@nyunews.com>, <emalabanan@nyunews.com>, <gstotz@nyunews.com>, <kkomanduri@nyunews.com>, <srt9826@stern.nyu.edu>, <lolukoga@nyunews.com>, <gtan@nyunews.com>, <jkim@nyunews.com>, <nroy@nyunews.com>, <tips@nyunews.com>, <opinion@nyunews.com>, <mgmt@nyunews.com>

Hey NYU Femsoc,

You blocked me on IG because I gave you good advice. 

I try my best to be an ally and not mansplain to and complain about, you in general.

But blocking me when I was being helpful is obtuse.

For everyone else:

They posted these photos:

My "block worthy" comment was something like "if you let me give a talk about stalker defense I'd begin with "imagine killing them" (the stalker)."

*****

You're afraid of men. Unwisely afraid. Self defense begins at facing fear directly.

Thus begins in expanded form this essay about how to successfully deal with stalkers.

You'd like to solve the problem not just define it right?

First of all I am not your stalker so you can chill.

That's your first failure. "Enemy identification".

If you take advice on this subject from any man I'm the right one.

Continuing:

Who is "a stalker"?

A stalker is a boy who doesn't take no for an answer and continues to try to get your love and attention in various ways, none of which you like.

And you can't make him stop.

How are you trying to make him stop?

That's all I'd like to offer here: alternative ways to make him stop. Because a determined seeker of attention won't be put off by being blocked.

After this essay, I, will be put off by being blocked. I've never met any of you and given your skiddish nature I guess we won't be fast friends.

A stalker sees that you've blocked him and will not get the message. You know that part.

What you don't know is what to do about it. Unfortunately you are smaller and by default, weaker than your opponent. You feel vulnerable.

*****

"When weak, attack." That's the PhD summary of good military strategy.

"Military" I know is not your cup of tea. But what is a stalker?

The enemy.

Blocking someone, is the military equivalent of hiding in a bunker.

When weak, attack. Otherwise that's what the enemy will do to you.

I understand the idea of "attacking" anyone isn't what you want to do and I agree. Peace and pleasant dealings and good vibes is a good life.

But if you are being attacked and that's what a stalker does even passively, you gotta retaliate.

You must fight, back. Not cower. Do not cower and run it doesn't work. You already know it doesn't work. You do it for lack of a better idea. You think you're weak and vulnerable girls and all you can do is hide and hope the cavalry-police arrives in time to save you.

Bad. Any force that allows the enemy to take the initiative will lose.

You want to fight back. You don't want to cower.

How?

"Fuck off I don't want to talk to you." Start there. Being angry and vulgar at an already weak man will neuter some of them immediately.

"Go away before I hurt you." That's even better. Because these men, in their minds, are doing the right thing. "If only she'd give me a real chance she'd see I'm good."

You don't owe them a chance. It's not a negotiation. You don't want to deal with them and you aren't interested in changing your mind.

"I don't want you. I don't like you. I hate you and that's never gonna change! You are the worst part of my day. Get the fuck away from my eyes and ears and me."

But if you aren't explicit, they won't get it. If you aren't dangerously firm they won't hear you.

"Dangerously firm" means you have to scare the boy. While the police can scare them, they will only be afraid of the police. 

You want them to be afraid of you.

Stalker boys think you are harmless, and they think there are few if any consequences from their activities. 

Give them some consequences.

Give them evil consequences. Mean consequences. Make your brain go to the dark side. What can you, do, to fuck with them? What can you do to stalk your stalker?

That's attacking. Stalkers "attack" you by harassing you. Following you. Talking to you when you don't wanna hear it.

Return the favor.

I know it seems counter intuitive to give the bastard attention but it'll be brief if you do it right.

A mother bear. She's weaker than her male counterpart. But what is the one kind of bear no animal wants to mess with in the woods?

A mother with her cubs.

Why?

Ferocious. She is ferocious. Absolutely defiantly vicious on behalf of her baby bears.

You gotta do that on behalf of yourself.

You gotta roar! at your stalker. Show your teeth and look at him like you'd enjoy...

Enjoy hurting him. Like you'd enjoy killing him. I know you don't like that idea. That's why you blocked me. Nonetheless. You gotta get there in your mind.

You gotta get out of your bunker and be on your opponent like a hurricane from hell.

You're faster. Quicker. You have advantages. And you have time. It's your time. By taking the attack to the enemy you remove his ability to bother you when he wants because you're bothering him.

Stalk your stalker. Scare him. Personally. Confident powerful men will not stalk you. Weak men do that. Weak men think "I gotta have HER!" when strong men know there are a lot of "hers" out there and won't waste a second on you after you've said no.

A weak man can be bullied. Even by you. Can be manipulated by you, easily.

Example: what's a "sugar daddy"? A weak stalker-kinda man who is being used, by a wiley woman.

A wiley women will redirect a man's enthusiasm for her in a positive direction. A wiley woman will pretend to like a stalker enough to get them doing her bidding.

I am not suggesting be a sugar baby as a tactic. That has long term dangers. I'm saying notice how some women know what to do with an annoying guy to extract benefit and be safe.

You can do that. Do that.

More tips:

Stalker men are not good at fighting. They are not dangerous to other men. And they wouldn't be dangerous to you if you put even a little effort in being dangerous yourself.

Carry a weapon. Find something lethal but inocuous. To carry in your bag. A screw driver. Wrench. A tool. Harmless seeming until you whack him with it when he's not ready and done. He'll be done and you'll feel great.

Practice with it. Hang up a plastic cup and pretend it's his face.

*****

Hate. You gotta hate him with vengeance. That's the killer attitude and if you get that attitude around him he'll go running for the hills.

"That girl's crazy." You want him to think that about you. Do your best Glenn Close impression from "Fatal Attraction". Fake it. But fake it well.

He wants you to be his girlfriend? "I'll be his girlfriend alright. He's gonna block me!"

*****

Summary:

Be dangerous:

"You will be cruel to the stalker, and through your cruelty he will know who you are. 

The stalker wont be able to help himself but imagine the cruelty he will endure at your hands, and your heels, and the edge of your keys. And the stalker will be sickened by you. And the stalker will fear you. When the stalker closes his eyes at night and is tortured by his subconscious with the evil he is doing, it will be with thoughts of you he is tortured with."

*****

Your friend maybe next year?

-Alex

Your Congressman in two years.

--Wolf Alexander