Even when I am not.
*****
An EEG shows that our brains produce electrical signals. Waves. Like a radio transmitter.
You know how you often know when a man is staring at you without seeing him?
That's our literal sixth sense. You are picking up "stalker vibrations" -- the person-staring-at-you's brain waves.
Waves which communicate danger.
A man staring at you usually has one thing in mind. It's a hunter's mentality. He emits those frequencies and you receive them because his attention is focused on you, and they are real signals. An EEG plugged into a horny boys' head while his eyes follow you would show the same.
You pick up what he's putting out.
Women are more sensitive to this energy for evolutionary safety.
*****
I not only emit these signals like everyone else, but I receive the "returns".
When I send electrical energy it is more powerful and more directed than other mens'.
So I think something, and it causes someone else to think something and usually do something.
I am doing it while in my hotel room. Alone.
I have to get high to increase the power but when so, I can think, without looking, without a line of sight (through walls) and can get that message to a nearby human.
Before you say that's crazy, it's not. We all make this energy. That part isn't disputed. And most of us have gotten the "we're being watched" feeling, or other similar unexplainable by the five senses feelings.
All I am saying is I am better at making it, and I am expecting it to be received. Thus I am waiting for the response, which I note.
*****
Fear is a very strong signal. Not dying is our number one priority at all times so when we fear death for any reason, even a silly one, we emit strong fear energy, because our brain goes into instant-overdrive.
Men are tuned from birth to pick that one up. Because male vs male warfare is natural for female attention. When your opponent fears you, the natural response almost all men have is "attack".
I get it all the time.
Because I am the boldest boy in The Big Apple, other men recognize that I am challenging them with everything I do.
So when I stumble, even mentally,. they get excited about my momentary weakness.
Mental weakness. That they recognize. From the fear signal I sent.
When they sense weakness, most mens' excitement about their "vulnerable opponent" causes them to get loud. To say something. To roar or growl in a societally acceptable way. Usually they just talk in a raised voice.
*****
"My inner thoughts are often on stage".
When I am at The Park hanging out, I know my inner thoughts are being received by a large audience.
I am not saying you hear the words. I am saying you "sense" their summary. You can sense my momentary mood based on what I am thinking.
I know you do. Because I can hear, with my ears, the returns you send in sound. Or lack thereof.
Example: you spitfire walk by me while I am playing guitar.
You are talking enjoyably to your girlfriend.
I get all excited because you, a super hot girl, are nearby. I can hear the sexiness in your sharp energetic voice.
You feel my excitement and grow a little quieter. You picked up my unhidable attraction, but if I am unfamiliar, you didn't know from experience that I am gallant and not a threat.
I notice your sudden shyness by the drop in your speech volume, and I calm my thoughts to make you feel better.
You pick up my "down boy" thinking and feel better, and resume talking at your previous volume and excitement.
*****
I have done that so often I have proven it, to myself, with the scientific method.
*****
What I am not good enough at, yet, is doing that while we look at each other.
There is no more powerful exchange of signals than when you look at a man and he looks back. You are sending out "I am interested" and what I do, is get scared.
I still, for all my tremendous domination, of other men, in all realms, remain afraid of you.
Because I am not good at that unspoken conversation yet. When you are interested in me but want me to approach, you give me "the look".
I don't know exactly what you're saying in your head, but it's probably what I am saying in mine: "come talk to me".
My first experiences with that were huge failures. Back in K-12. I was awful, with girls. I thought I was ugly and a loser and when we feel like that you perceive us like that. So whenever a girl would look at me my eyes would run away.
Later I got good at the "damn the torpedoes!" tactic, which means I would approach every girl without looking for your "eyes-invitation", and do the best I could. And if "no" I'd try another.
I didn't mind getting shot down 9 times to succeed the tenth.
But that's not how I must do it.
I must do what I used to be so scared of. Looking and waiting for your eyes-invitation and immediately acting on it. Coming over smoothly and saying hi.
It's goddamn terrifying for no reason. It's a bad mental habit I have to conquer.