Opening Day!! for Next Years Election!


Was yesterday.

Saturday, August... twenty third, 2025.

Hey! N.Y.U.! 

the greatest university I never considered. Stupid of me. If you've seen my UVA gear I didn't go to UVA. I campaigned there briefly and I from VIRGINIA! the western part.

*****

You're invited to listen to the music I am listening to while I write for You.

*****

Who saw me at The Park? Spitfire! There were a lot of you around yesterday. I flirted awfully with one of you and she was not having it. Lol. I didn't know what to say except "will you make out with me?" and I haven't tried that yet.

I am there for your attention and approach. Yeah I want to win and yeah I'm going to win but I can't lie. I am doing what you do, in reverse. Making myself unignorable and expecting you to hit on me. 

She sat down and listened to me play guitar and sing for a good while. I snuck a glance or two first to make sure it wasn't a dude cause fuck them never and when I saw her I got nervous, as usual. But she stayed and "enjoyed the show" I gather and as I was packing up I couldn't not say something... and said something ridiculous. "You're really hot and I want to talk to you but I'm not allowed" or thereabout.

She got up and took off. I wanted to hit myself with a foam mallet. Sometimes I say stupid stuff to women like my dad did because he never, and I mean never, cheated on my mom. At least while I was alive and I never sensed he had. Anyway he still liked women platonically I guess and was friendly and nice, but not suave.

Not a ladies man. Not a good role model for a single boy. A decent role model as a partner. But I got no eyes and ears on instruction about how to be Steve McQueen around you except from movies we watched together.

So when I get nervous I revert back to his Frank Drebin personality and do not, appear, like the absolute assassin for love that I am.

*****

I may be back today!

Yesterday I flew (walked like a demon) a lot and fast yesterday and I was really tired but it's now 2:35 am and I am "ready for war".

I am ready for you, mesdemoiselles. For You, any badass girl-of-The-Park.

If you start flirting I'll be rizz central. If I start, which I'm gonna have to...

Don't make fun of me too much, okay? I am seriously not this awkward. I just can't fuck up. I can't give any woman a bad impression.

A funny story to tell your girlfriend is not a bad impression.

*****

To any or all of the three "red baronesses" around The Fountain. I wanted to stand there and talk to all of you all afternoon but same thing. I don't wanna invade your space uninvited and whatever I have to do to make sure none of you ever has a fearful word to say about me, I will do. Including not trying to ask one two or all three of you out right then.

I am a gallant boy and if I must be lonely to stay that way, I will. Until one of you can't take it anymore and just pulls the trigger.

The End!

*****

Bonus Section!

"You said 'The End'".

"Yeah but this is a comedy".

*****

I "shot down an ME-262". I "am flying a P-38".

I first slammed into, then filmed threatened and chased a boy on a bicycle out of The Park because he was riding the thing around like everyone was supposed to get out of his way.

I don't mind that attitude from men about other men because that's mine and I'm not a hypocrite. But I do mind when when men give you that attitude. And he was. He was riding right down the middle of every path and expecting women to weave around him.

No.


I really, enjoy taking on other men because I do not care AT ALL! about their, impression of me and I get to be downright dangerous. It's fun! I always win. I have yet to lose a "man off" with any male man guy boy or dude in my district and I never will.