Frankly, I don't want some "sit on my lap children!" jackass plunging his way into my house.
How about Ms. Claus, his daughter? Maybe granddaughter. The hottest female member of the Claus family can come down my chimney any time she wants.
She doesn't have to bring other gifts. Nor do I expect that skimpy outfit it's cold outside. She can wear the full suit over top. Gotta have the hat of course.
And no reindeer on the roof waiting. They can fly off somewhere else. We'll be a while. In fact, I'm the last house anything's getting drop off at, cause the delivery girl's gonna be busy.
Next Christmas, Ms. Claus'll be here. Her idea. She's quitting The Man's workshop and giving herself as a present to me.
For her I have more than milk and cookies. She'll be pleased.