That is a non-violent legal joke.
From: Wolf Alexander <allwomensrights@gmail.com>
Dear Seth Gross on behalf of Legal Aid NYC men.
I don't want your representation. There is nothing you can do in a courtroom I can't do. And if there's something you can do with a keyboard I can figure it out.
Please assign me as pro-se, as soon as legally possible. If I have to wait until the 28th I want that in writing, immediately upon finishing this sentence.
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If you are continuing to read without doing what I said that's why I don't want you as my attorney.
You don't want me as your client. "It's the one that says Bad Fatherfucker".
I have a misdemeanor and you can goddamn guarantee, I am going to get my full legal fantasy camp experience out of it this time. Because I am ready from the outside in.
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Lawyers as a professional are lame. Like, what do you like, do? I thought someone that's in the esquires would enjoy a really gritty case, but that's not how it works.
The entire career is one big homework assignment from hell. Nothing enjoyable to read. Nothing creative to build. Unless a 100 page book report about bad books is fun.
And then there's the part where I am very aggressive about getting myself out of trouble, while all of you do not give a goddamn. Which since it's not your hide, I get.
What's the one thing you don't want to do about my case (or any case)?
More work.
THAT'S HOW THE COCKSUCKER FOR THE STATE FEELS. SO WHEN I START MAKING HIM WORK HE'LL START RECONSIDERING THIS TRIAL.
Or he'll want to fight. Which he will lose. To an amateur.
FOR THE JUDGE
I have done and was commended by Judge Louis Marks for Teen Court.
I won my high school mock trial.
I attended an Ivy League University, cum laude.
I have been arrested 30 times and been through dozens of hearings. So I am prepared for whatever occurs.
I have written reconsiderations and other legal garbage for various inmates. I know the format well enough to make everything presentable.
My representation thus far has been genuine but not good enough. I want to do whatever "damage" I can to the opposition before trial. That's how you are supposed to play according to TV and if it's fun and possible, sign me up your honor(honoress).
Seriously I can out lawyer that whole Legal Aid building with a paralegal and can do it in the courtroom regardless.
Thank you for the consideration of this motion which I am filing with my current attorney Seth Gross to file with you in whatever manner will get THEM FIRED by finishing this sentence.
LightningLover.com