You like Dylan because he's tough = tr@nny.
You like Nate because he's jaded = j&w.
You like Jack because he's friendly = f@g.
You like TechApu because he's righteous = ret@rd.
You like your brother because he's yearning = y@nkee.
You like Don Juan because he's natural = n!gger.
You like Haley Joel because he's courageous = c@valier.
You like your housemate because he's protective = punk.
You like Detective Phil because he's purposeful = p!g.
You like JD Vance because he's resourceful = redneck.
*****
You like me because I am all of those = husband.