Me too. I can hear it in your voice when you say "you're the problem".
I can trace that back to a time in the past when you wanted to scream "there's nothing wrong with me!!!"
Of course when you do that they say there's definitely something wrong with you. Psychiatry made their judgment into a Chinese finger trap. The more you argue and fight their labels the worse your "illness" is.
You have a huge reservoir of hate. They hurt you. They deserve it. How do you unleash hell without hurting yourself?
Takes practice.
Don't consider it self improvement. Revenge is best served accurately and safely.
*****
Oh Rachel. How i love thee.
Be selfish and try me.
If i thought we weren't perfect, for each other, i would have moved on. But you are the spectacular coming to life of my dreamgirl.
Won't you trust me a tad more? Test how we do as super secret pen pals.
Imagine if you liked me. Imagine liking a boy who likes you this much. How awesome that would be. To be doted on by your hero.
I am waiting. Hoping. Praying to you. Trying with every bit of intelligence and spirit.
That will never change. The passion i have for you unrequited will not dim after decades.
You will be so, fucking. Happy! Like you were at the end of "perfect". Forever.
I can't spend the rest of my life without you. Being with you would make this all worth it. Every day of suffering. And girl did i suffer. I suffered for believing in myself above all others. I knew you were out here.
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LightningLover.com