Irony of Ironies

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Wolf Alexander <thespitfirehunter@gmail.com>
Date: Sat, Dec 14, 2024, 19:05
Subject: Irony of Ironies
To: Victor Hedron <Sethsturm@gmail.com>

Children, real ones, really like me. Always have.

They loved me as a teacher.

They loved me as a counselor.

Even though I hate them more than cats BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK GOOD ARE THEY?

Nonetheless they really like me.

Why?

Because I let them do what they want. And who doesn't like that? 

Teaching kids is so simple: Let them figure it out. 

Answer their questions. Encourage them to be independent. THEN LEAVE THEM ALONE! 

Parents are the stupidest type of human. They aren't kids by definition. So they don't know how to inspire children. 

Children are the smartest. In real time learning capability. They are creative curious and candid. Very, very easy to deal with. 

ABSOLUTELY NO BULLSHIT. Children don't know what it is. 

American kids learn about bullshit when they find out Santa is a lie, and they get good at it to deal with their stupid goddamn never-leave-them-the-fuck-alone parents.

I taught this kid downstairs how to be The Man just now. How to be big. Bold. And loud. All from 4 minutes of darts.

I throw darts like Don Newcombe. BIG DON for the Dodgers. THE BROOKLYN mother fuckin' Dodgers. Wind up and leg kick and THWACK into the board and I gotta Yank'em back out.

This boy - as I am a boy - was throwing darts like he was doing accounting. Not like he was hunting a wild animal. 

We human wild animals like feeling like a wild animal and hunting of the physical kind is that. Children are the least brain washed by society therefore they take to wild things very quickly.

*****

I told him to throw the darts hard. That he couldn't break anything. Have a good time.

He threw them hard. Most stuck. A few rattled and fell and I smiled to be encouraging and he smiled because he got to be forceful with something without getting yelled at by his stupid-for-having-children-in-the-first-place parents.

This was the same child as bored as I was at least night's very adult party.

It just occurred to me. I didn't see any dancing.

I am nine. He seems that ish. We were bored brothers. I didn't commiserate. I hate children what the fuck good are they?

Sex great. 

Kids bad. 

#DriveThruAbortions

P.S. Seth if the New York Times printed this - if a million eyes were on it - I'd be instantly famous.

So no, I am sticking with my Gonzo journalism.