Doing Everything by the Book


Do you, spitfire -- girl with grit, gumption and gravity -- do you spitfire, know how, hard it is for me to do things "the right way"?

I am, a rebel, to the core. If it says "do not enter" not only do I enter I cut down the sign on my way past.

Metaphorically of course. And I don't mean in the romantic department. I always have obeyed those rules.

I mean in The Real World. The rules of American society inc. Those I hated following.

An example: "apply to join our group". When I have filled out such applications my attitude was "these people should be flattered I am seeking their company". So I sent in sarcastic answers.

While it remains true I am the best boy ever and have creative talents in a dozen departments pouring out of me, I can't act like that so strongly. At least at first.

As I prepare to conquer -- I mean live -- as I prepare to live in New York City, I have to remember:

I want New Yorkers to like me. I want you to accept me. I want you to root for me. And I probably want one of you to love me.

So I can't bulldoze and dynamite my way into your heart. Fun as that was when dealing with some boys in the past, now I must. Be. Good. Not Dennis the Menace.

I can menace my opponent for Congress. Only him. And his tools, perhaps. And his billionaire backers certainly.

Everyone else I will offer an open, free, and friendly chance or three to get to like me. I won't get offended by a lack of male awe. I will earn that.

Female awe I have earned. Spitfire... you are so hot. Be my Valentine!

*****

Instructions. Rules. The way it's always done. Etiquette. Peer pressure. All of that I have been a card carrying killer of since I was born. Now I'm not.

Now I'm not. Now I'm not. Now I'm not.

"I will not write "fuck you" on the chalkboard before class. I will not write "fuck you" on the chalkboard before class..."

There are all kinds of people with groups and businesses and stuff I want to participate in, that are gatekeepers. 

While I subtly will be unable to remove the sense of mafioso from my persona, I have to get them to open their gates and be happy about it. Any single gatekeeper I can threaten and make do certain things, but they'll tell the others and it won't work out as well for me.

I want to be happily invited to other things by other people. Because I am so friendly, fascinating and fun!

I can do that. I've done it before.

I can do that. I've done it before.

*****

I want to live, in New York. I want to be a part, of New York. I want to be a New Yorker. 

I want New York to "love" me. Like me. Get me to join. Invite me over. Ask me out.

THIS IS DIFFERENT. This is not practice. This is not a throw away chance. This is it.

"A man would have to put his soul at hazard. He'd have to say 'OK. I'll be part of this world.'"

My name is Alexander. Child of the sun.


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