Congressman Alexander's Broadsheet

I am aboard a subway that is late. Not for me -- the air conditioning is right on time. My :The Park" day was fun! As always. I stared down a loud boy from 50 yards away and he stopped being loud. Then I  kept staring so he'd not repeat smashing something into a trash can and roaring about I didn't care. He saw me stare at him. It was a "deer in a gunsight" look. Although I've never killed an amimal while hunting. Humans are they animals? He jumped and got scared. I enjoyed that. I hit him dead center in the forehead with my anger energy and he saw it and felt it, and flinched.  I kept staring at him for way longer than was necessary in case he wanted to say something to me. He didn't. I got some press tonight! I saw a flash a few times. Someone took pictures. Probably a man unfortunately but I didn't look up. I listen for your voices I try not to stare.  Whatever is most chivalrous I do. I never assume you want me. I guess you like my pre...

Adrienne Adams for Mayor! ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Mon, Jun 30, 2025 at 4:07 PM Subject: I Doubt You'll Do This To: < SpeakerAdams@council.nyc.gov > But you definitely should. With three men, including two independents in the race this fall, a woman with your credentials could best all of them by getting half the female vote while the boys fight amongst themselves for the scraps. -Alex Spitfire Hunter .com

BLACK WOMEN ARE SO MUCH BRAVER THAN YOU ARE. Black girls got it going on in the courage department. You white ones are just sad. I have had multiple sisters be flirty with me while you paler ones pale at my sight.  Are you really that weak and scared of a shadow? If so I don't want you anyway. WHERE YOU BLACK WOMEN AT?! Harlem. That's where. See you soon.

( About Bob Gibson ) No boy has worked harder to get your attention and affection than I have. I have changed myself from a weak ass loser into the man among men. THEY ALL SUCK COMPARED TO ME. EVERY LAST COCKSUCKING ONE OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You wanna be with a lousy guy? Good. You can complain about him on social media later. I AM ALEXANDER THE GREATEST. I AM THE GREATEST BROTHER FUCKING BACHELOR IN THE COUNTRY.  I even stopped saying "mother fucker" as a feminist edit. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????!!!!!!!!! I refuse to flirt with you. I'm not doing it. YOU! do it. I deserve it. I goddamn deserve it. If you would swoon and fangirl over any male celebrity YOU SHOULD GODDAMN WELL DO IT OVER ME. I CAN KILL THAT CELEBRITY TWICE OVER AND HANG HIM OUT TO DRY. I figured it out. I piss you off because you decided a man like me didn't exist. You already said "fuck men they're all awful". Then you see me and I blow tha...

At "Buttermilk" somewhere north of The Verrazano Bridge.. ***** It's hard for me to avoid pissing off men I have to talk to. The bartender here hates me. Because I have taken over his bar. It's humorous. ***** Yeah i can't help being ever so slightly disrespectful to all males. Enough we both know I am. But not enough for them to do anything about it. I love it. I love you, girls. ***** To be continued.. ***** Okay! So I'm alive and not really hungover. it's the next morning. I would call that a successful campaign event and an unsuccessful find true love event. I had several favorite parts of the evening. But my favorite favorite part was being the block and tackle for a very beautiful.blonde damsel, that got stuck between a homeless drunk and me. You m'lady got to watch me dispatch "the bum". I was gently terryifying to him and totally gallant for you! ***** The men who bother you in New York have never gotten any pushback it se...

Before I do, I understand that it's going to sound very misogynistic at first read.  I am not a misogynist. I really love you, ladies. I love your half of the species infinitely more than mine. ***** It is beneath me to hit on you. See I told you it would sound misogynistic. But hear me out, okay? 1. I know, I will make one mademoiselle the happiest woman, on the face of the earth. I know I am the perfect boyfriend. I have been in enough relationships and around enough of you intimately, that I am beyond belief fact not fiction certain, that I will be the hero of one heroine. 2. Approaching any of you, despite long practice and many "successes" remains -- knowing full well I am the biggest, baddest, boldest boy out there -- a harrowing experience. To be blunt, I am scared of hitting on you. And I have good reason to be.  In the past, when I would flirt, and fail, so what? I was a relative nobody and whoever "shot me down" would forget about me and I could try ag...

---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Mon, Jun 23, 2025, 4:53 PM Subject: SONDER YOU HAVE THE WORST GODDAMN CHECK-IN SYSTEM IN AMERICA To: < press@sonder.com >, < reservations@sonder.com >, < ir@sonder.com > Cc: < Services@sertifi.net > Desr Sonder Hotels, You owe me $1012.34 PLUS INTEREST AND FEES. I ALREADY PAID YOU FOR MY STAY. See? You hire lovely people (Naomi L.) but your hotel is a scam.  I was made to pay an additional $1012.34 to check-in after I already paid for the stay in full with Agoda. I wanted to check-in more than argue and Naomi assured me I would get a refund with your compliments. I WANT THAT REFUND REAL FAST BOYS. AND I WANT YOU TO THROW IN ONE FREE NIGHT AT THE END OF MY STAY FOR THE TROUBLE. Capisce Messrs Hoteliers? Mr. Michael Hughes, Rahul Thumati, Francis Davidson and Martin Picard. This is going in my newspaper. Forever. If you're going to u...

What's the fun of having a billion bucks if you "need" a permanent baby sitter with you at all times? "Her bodyguard let her boyfriend act like her boyfriend." How awesome! Just kidding. What a joke! Whatever amount of money I end up with, one thing's certain. I'm doing my own security work on behalf of myself and whoever you are future girlfriend. We won't need a baby sitter. Kidnappers will die at my feet. Paparazzi will run for the hills. And fans won't fan unless we want fans. So what would we need a security doofus for? It's sad and must be very upsetting for "Tough Travis" to have to be driven around and ordered about while squiring his lady. 

---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > Date: Sun, Jun 22, 2025, 2:58 PM Subject: The Real Greta Thunberg Stood Up To: < info@thegretathunbergfoundation.org > Greta the Great! You need one of those Hunger Games "Girl on Fire!" suits to wear around the world! I read your statement : I wish you had real power. How old do you have to be to be The Prime Minister of Sweden? It's too small a job for you though.  You're inventing your own: the First President of the World. As celebrities go you're already as powerful as Princess Diana. And dare I say hotter. I dared. I dare you to reply. :0) Personally I was sad for myself and happy for you, that you have at the moment a boyfriend and that he seems to love so much.  But why didn't he stay by your side during your invasion?  I wouldn't have left you unless you made me and then not without a lot of argument, if I had been your boyfriend. ...

Don't have a train? I mean a plane. Well really I mean all three. 1. More subway cars for the EXPANSION of NYC transit  2. A car or an airplane someday. Car now. BY "NOW" I MEAN 2029 AND AFTER. Those are some of what the billionaires will pay for if you are an American or are a New Yorker. My district is lower Manhattan. Yours also if you live in Western Brooklyn. Where this A train is almost. ***** Caves are cooler than above ground. Subways are human-made caves. So it oughta be cooler down here. It's not. I'll get that fixed too. All sorts of fun things are possible after I win my second term. ALSO: Free A-Z Taxes? Nope.  Free land? Yup.  Clean water? Drinkable rivers? Yup. Smoke and smog free air? Yup. ABORTION ON DEMAND DELIVERY AND DRIVE-THRU? Yup. Many more yups include: No billionaires. The category. Clean cities full of happier people. Vacations as a career. Until 1757 is achieved the ground is the limit. To fix the environment you will have to...

S'il vous plait: TELL A GIRLFRIEND to read my Broadsheet. I won't ever charge you to read my stories so please do me the favor. Thank you in advance.

Ladies I beg your pardon if you disagree. I will listen to your arguments and sympathize with your compassionate effort but I doubt I'll change my mind. ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Wed, Jun 18, 2025 at 5:02 PM Subject: All Womens' Rights! No jk, JK To: < contact@visualnatives.com >, < sales@visualnatives.com >, < opportunities@visualnatives.com >, < dj@boygeorge.com >, < info@mountainfilm.org >, < jonathan@intertalentgroup.com >, < alex@intertalentgroup.com >, < georgia@intertalentgroup.com >, < alia@intertalentgroup.com >, < oliviabertolotti@intertalentgroup.com >, < michael@wildeslaw.com >, < info@bnmusic-artists.com >, < talk@jla.co.uk >, < scp@castlefineart.com >, < sms@castlefineart.com >, < cgn@castlefineart.com >, < glasgow@castlefineart.com >, < edinburgh@cas...

Who's afraid to fight. ***** The kind of man who goes into politics is a boy who wants to "lead a lot of men in a desperate battle" but doesn't want to get shot at. (I don't want to get shot at OR be anywhere near men) A poltician tells soldiers what to do from afar. WAY! afar. Like Washington to Tehran. Or West Virginia to New York. People like my on again off again "Campaign Admiral" Seth Sturm who is on the National Pure Bullshit (NPB) board of directors. He has all kinds of good ideas for me to try from the comfort of his chair. 300 miles away. He's got great ways for me to risk my neck but none for his own. That's a poltician. Donald Chump is playing games with millions of people's lives for his entertainment. Otherwise he'd say "world peace at any price" and get that done. He's not. I am. From my, chair. Bed. A journalist is allowed to be lazy. Story telling is a relaxed art.

TO ALL AMERICAN JEWS: Choose: USA or Israel. ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > Date: Tue, Jun 17, 2025 at 9:34 AM Subject: Your Stupid Ass Country Is the Biggest Pain the Ass To: < ikshur5@012.net.il >, < eylon@president.il >, < naor@president.gov.il >, < doverut@knesset.gov.il >, < media@pmo.gov.il >, < kerenh@pmo.gov.il >, < mayanlazarrovich@gmail.com >, < lior.haiat@mfa.gov.il >, < ronp@press.pmo.gov.il >, < mariae@pmo.gov.il >, < zoharazali@gmail.com >, < idfintlspox@gmail.com >, < pniot@mod.gov.il >, < dover@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_exec@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_bic@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_expolicy@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_euam@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_mena@mod.gov.il >, < Sibat_aap@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_latinam@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_marcom@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_q...

After an eventful day in America'a worst state, (New Jersey), I am about home. Euclid Avenue, USA.  The A train is busy. I wanted to get off at my real favorite stop - West 4th Street - but I didn't. I said in a previous broadsheet that my favorite stop was High Street because of the name. But I don't want to disembark there.  Because of my don't kiss and tell specifics policy, I won't be telling specifics. How high are the subway tunnels? Cause New Jersey Transit has really nice rail cars. Double decker. If they fit the whole MTA system (expanded) New York will have them.  Which Billionaire do you want to pay? We can vote. I choose Michael Bloomberg. So far he's only paying for the never ending except at midnight for the neighbors party at The Park. ALL CAMPAIGN PROMISES FOR MY SECOND TERM IN 2029. I won't be able to be anything but be a menace to the two-party men the first term.

Video Commentary I was at my redoubt near The Fountain when I heard a commotion. A male band member called his bandmates a bunch of fags (one of "The New George Carlin Seven Dirty Words") and stormed away in a huff. After I glared at him for being a general nuisance, he returned to the group and tried to "steal" an instrument. (I misread the situation. It was personal not political speech so it wasn't my business unless he was insulting one of you ladies which I couldn't confirm) When he grabbed at the instrument or road case several yelled in protest and sorta stopped him. Far as I could tell the problem was over. Then Johnny Law Jackass and friends showed up. A whole squad of Rangers. Including a blonde bombshell who I must meet. The biggest man of course had to be the hero when I don't think one was needed and went to tackle the offender. So they restrained this dude for his schoolyard infraction. Arrest and jail and thousands of dollars a...

IN 2029 work will begin and it won't take forever ON A SUBWAY EXPANSION see map in fuscia EXPRESS TO LAGUARDIA AND JFK FROM DOWNTOWN and an outer buroughs lifesaver! WHEN I WIN AND AM SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE promise I am arriving at Broadway Junction as I type ALSO IT WILL BE FREE. PAID FOR BY A BILLIONAIRE You know how you can link your debit card to refill your OMNI card? It wiil be Elon Musk's debit card! That refills YOUR OMNI. Sound like fun? A billionaire paying the bills a day will keep the debts away.

Practice, technically. I'm tawlkin' bout practice. Not the game. Practice. In Central Park up at 99th. Map at bottom, female fighters of yore, now. There's supposed to be bows and arrows, swords, knives - all foam of course.  I am on the subwAy almost to my favorite stop in Brooklyn. Guess. It's on the A line. You should only need one guess. ***** Guess now reveal next. **** High how're you? I am not high enough. I only got one puff in before the puff puff passer arrived.  "The choo choo" I gave up my seat to a woman a moment ago. I hadn't sat down yet. So I asked and held it for her until she could claim it. ***** I am getting campaign t-shirts today, courtesy of my armourer Jose and lady armourers at Embroidery House and Son. Finally I can have a sign on that's not my cape.  I need a cooler temperature wise cape for next summer. Cotton is Congressman. Whenever a phrase has "king" in it I swap it for "Congressman". That's a...

I HELP MYSELF :0) ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Thu, Jun 12, 2025 at 12:41 PM Subject: Andrew Cuomo for Homo: Means Human To: < rich@bulldog-strategies.com >, info@andrewcuomo.com < info@andrewcuomo.com >, < ryan@andrewcuomo.com >, < kate@andrewcuomo.com >, < wendv@andrewcuomo.com >, < kgrahamcpa@gmail.com >, < volunteer@zohranfornyc.com >, < press@zohranfornyc.com > Cc: < reservations@thedailyshow.com >, < internship@thedailyshow.com >, < jenflanz@thedailyshow.com >, < info@thedailyshow.com >, < help@thedailyshow.com >, < Mets@thedailyshow.com >, < tilzer@roar.la >, Michael Kosta < michael@michaelkosta.com >, < dbo@dixontalent.com >, < ramin.hedayati@gmail.com >, < jmelkmann@thedailyshow.com >, < tickets@thedailyshow.com >, < desi.lydic@gmail.com >, < contact@r...

From: Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > Date: Thu, Jun 12, 2025, 10:48 AM Subject: Re: I Have Never Seen Such a Badass Picture To: < info@thegretathunbergfoundation.org > (forever) On Thu, Jun 12, 2025, 10:47 AM Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > wrote: Badass means superhero in American English. Israeli girls in the IDF are jealous of how hot you look. Tough and beautiful is a very difficult look to nail. You nailed it. Can you please message me? I must have you. -Alex

---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > Date: Thu, Jun 12, 2025, 10:28 AM Subject: I am Neal Miller To: Seth Sturm < sethsturm@gmail.com > from Wikipedia about The Great! John Henry . West Virginia steel driving man. ***** ".. known as Neal Miller, [he] told me in plain words how he had come to the tunnel with his father at 17, how he carried water and drills for the steel drivers, how he saw John Henry every day, and, finally, all about the contest between John Henry and the steam drill. "When the agent for the steam drill company brought the drill here," said Mr. Miller, "John Henry wanted to drive against it. He took a lot of pride in his work and he hated to see a machine take the work of men like him. "Well, they decided to hold a test to get an idea of how practical the steam drill was. The test went on all day and part of the next day. "John Henry won. He wouldn't rest ...

I still say "A woman for mayor!" and she's got the right stuff. Adrienne Adams for Mayor! (no relation to the current cocksucker) ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Thu, Jun 12, 2025, 6:20 AM Subject: I Stand Corrected Zohran To: < volunteer@zohranfornyc.com >, < press@zohranfornyc.com > Cc: < SpeakerAdams@council.nyc.gov > It seems you might stun the world and win without my help.   Bravo! Although I can claim credit for putting a charge into you a couple months ago. Bottom line? You're not an Alsoran. ***** However you are term limited. New York needs a female mayor like the country needs a female President.  Even if you got a sex change that wouldn't qualify you. So the next time, I'm going to make sure you lose. Hopefully to Speaker Adams. But here and now, keep pouring it on. Try to win by 15 points not 1.5. Godspeed John Glenn! --Wolf Alexan...

Mesdemoiselles I am excited because at 6pm I get to hit men with "a sword". Except not the best kind. That's illegal. Code Duello will be back soon though. Guns are dangerous because it's a small bomb. Swords are big kitchen knives. The danger is added by effort. So as a weapon it'a super safe except to the person it's slashed at. Women of New York! Fence with me? For fun. They're foam. Any Tuesday at 6 the NYC Fighting Club says. At the "Sandbox" along the southern walkway, eastern side. Washington Square! :0)

---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < thespitfirehunter@gmail.com > Date: Tue, Jun 10, 2025 at 9:06 AM Subject: Dear Great Greta To: < info@thegretathunbergfoundation.org > Greata. Has anyone called you that before? I claim it even if so. I saw you sitting in the plane. Really cute. Sorry I know that word is overused but it was my first thought. Can I love you forever? You have to say yes otherwise I will find another. I don't want to, because it's hard to imagine another greater, than you. But maybe you like being a rock star. And don't wanna "hang it up" for a boyfriend. No problem. I'm a rock star too. Unofficially. I started trying recently so I am behind you in the race for... we are not competing. I just love you is all. Sorry. Am I being weird? But if not you then who? Tell a girlfriend. I was in love with Taylor Swift some time ago but she's just a rock star. You are greater than that. You fought the second mos...

A "Mae West" is a life jacket in WWII. ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Wolf Alexander < congressmanalexander@gmail.com > Date: Mon, Jun 9, 2025 at 12:27 PM Subject: Benjamin Netanyahu You're a Yahoo To: < ikshur5@012.net.il >, < eylon@president.il >, < naor@president.gov.il >, < doverut@knesset.gov.il >, < media@pmo.gov.il >, < kerenh@pmo.gov.il >, < mayanlazarrovich@gmail.com >, < lior.haiat@mfa.gov.il >, < ronp@press.pmo.gov.il >, < mariae@pmo.gov.il >, < zoharazali@gmail.com >, < idfintlspox@gmail.com >, < pniot@mod.gov.il >, < dover@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_exec@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_bic@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_expolicy@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_euam@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_mena@mod.gov.il >, < Sibat_aap@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_latinam@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_marcom@mod.gov.il >, < sibat_qa@mod.g...