The Dearest Dear Jon Letter
---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Wolf Alexander <congressmanalexander@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Feb 18, 2025 at 9:46 AM
Subject: The Dearest Dear Jon Letter
To: <reservations@thedailyshow.com>, <internship@thedailyshow.com>, <veteranprogram@thedailyshow.com>, <jenflanz@thedailyshow.com>, <info@thedailyshow.com>, <help@thedailyshow.com>, <Mets@thedailyshow.com>, <tilzer@roar.la>, <michael@michaelkosta.com>, <dbo@dixontalent.com>, <ramin.hedayati@gmail.com>, <jmelkmann@thedailyshow.com>
From: Wolf Alexander <congressmanalexander@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Feb 18, 2025 at 9:46 AM
Subject: The Dearest Dear Jon Letter
To: <reservations@thedailyshow.com>, <internship@thedailyshow.com>, <veteranprogram@thedailyshow.com>, <jenflanz@thedailyshow.com>, <info@thedailyshow.com>, <help@thedailyshow.com>, <Mets@thedailyshow.com>, <tilzer@roar.la>, <michael@michaelkosta.com>, <dbo@dixontalent.com>, <ramin.hedayati@gmail.com>, <jmelkmann@thedailyshow.com>
If you are a man and your name isn't Jon Stewart, and you don't send this to him, you are fucked. He'll tell me who forwarded and who didn't and if you didn't, reread the last sentence.
*****
Dear Jon,
Thanks for the $10 million dollar advertisement you made for me, against my opponent, Dan Goldman. If I would have had to bribe you to do it, that's how much you would have asked for.
It will come in handy next year.
I was disappointed you didn't have a "Fuck this President" 's Day show. Next Monday I am going to hand out my cards to your audience-in-waiting. There are going to be notes on them saying "tell Jon I said high", etc. I have to pick aggressive, brave volunteers to make you take one. Don't shoot them down.
I. Need. You. To. Share. Something. Of. Mine. On. Your. Social. Media.
Now.
I mean I don't need it. I want it. It would be nice. Will you? Probably not. Should you? You probably should. Unless you are a charlatan and you've duped the progressive left and independent center for 25 years.
You are a coward and won't run for Congress. I am not a coward and I'm running for Congress. And we agree on pretty much everything. Except for you having me on this year. We probably don't agree on that.
I have to earn my fame. I'll be at Washington Square Park every day from ~4-6 recording TV and radio and writing and causing general humorous mayhem. Unless it's a special day, then I'll be there sometime. Like yesterday.
Stop by. I can't be scared but that would jolt me a bit.
Monday I am going to canvass your studio's neighborhood for wherever your staff hangs out and hopefully there's a bulletin board there. If I see any of your male correspondents I will give them my card and you can goddamn well bet they will tell you. Even big Mike will buckle. Won't you.
JON DO SOMETHING. STOP COMPLAINING AND DO SOMETHING. When is Chuck Schumer's seat up? That's yours. Perfect. 2028. I will win in 2026, and then it's yours. (independent only) Deal?
-Alex
--Wolf Alexander
P.S. Did you all notice that when Jon retired the country went to shit? 2015. Gay marriage made it. And after that? Jon retired. Trump's won ever since. Now that he's back and I'm here, that's going to stop.
